songbird's flying

[Guest]

yeah, I don't know why I called it flying, but I'm writing this in faith I guess. I know I will fly again and in fact I think I started already with some short flights. I'm testing my new wings so to say.

I've been off CO for some weeks, not because I didn't want to come, but I got into all these situations from other people that needed my help, but yeah I'm back.

one of the songs that has been really speaking to my heart is a song from Alberto & Kimberly Rivera. It's called Wings and it's from their cd Captured.
If you're able to find the song somewhere and listen it, it's beautiful.

just wanted to post the lyrics as my first day journaling, cause this song helped me so much to let go and step out again:


Wings - Alberto & Kimberly Rivera

nothing's gonna hold me back,
I'm gonna fly, so high
nothing's gonna hold me back,
I'm gonna fly, so high
fly

and I saw, that when some of you took from the Lord, your new wings,
you had this look on your face, you say: these are new, but I still have the memory of how it felt when I flied my broken wings
and I saw this fear in your eyes, what will it feel like to fly my new wings, will I still have the pain, will I still remember

and then I saw the Lord, looking to your eyes, and making a trading
and He said: the pain shall cease, even the memory shall be released, even the memory of the pain I shall take upon myself.
for I will not give you a new thing that will cause you pain
I will not give you a new thing that will cause you pain.

so don't be afraid to fly, don't be afraid to fly

for everyting I give is good.

You will fly in My goodness, fly in My love, safely under My wings.
You will fly in My faithfulness, fly in My comfort, fly in My mercy.
Stay close to Me, fly with Me
Stay close to Me, don't ever go away


God has given me new wings, yet I still had the fear of the memories of the past. Slowly He's been touching my heart and that's my journey. perhaps later I should make this journal into a book, for now I will just post my thoughts here

[ciny]

Little song bird
the song sounds beautiful it makes me feal free inside Just reading i just have to look it up now you are hellping people your helping me right now
have a God blessed night
Ciny

[Guest]

well I was not really helping them with counseling or so, but just gave a listening ear or practical help.

I feel like my story might be an encouragement to people. I just have to think in what way I'm going to write it all down. I think I will do it with song lyrics as well, cause there are many songs that have helped me through the years.

I don't know yet, it won't be a life story, it might be just putting my thoughts into words and share my vision about things I've learned

[Guest]

one of the things I've been thinking about lately is how desperate we really are for God. on one hand I see people around me and also here in CO that are really willing to go after God's heart, to die to self in order to live and on the other hand in church I see people who think everything is ok this way.

I've been thinking about myself then. Am I crazy? Am I taking this all too seriously? Am I too radical? No, not at all. I should become even more radical and the passion in my heart should burn brighter. I feel like that sometimes I see these things that Jesus spoke about, about the seperation between people. some people will become more holy, others become dirtier.

And I know that becoming more holy goes with ups and downs. the last weeks were really heavy and therefore I had no courage to come up here and write. I've been discovering parts of my past in which I still was trapped. I had been wondering why after breaking through so much I still was feeling this block in my emotions, why there was still this stone wall between me & God, why I was still feeling so much pain and so sensitive towards sexual abuse. first I thought that I was still in the healing process but if I looked clearly I knew that I had dealt with it. It was a new thing in my life, haunting from the past to destroy me. I found out that I was sexually abused as a child by an uncle. How my heart was crying that moment, how people prayed for me and I let all the emotions out. and yet, I'm still processing, I still don't understand, I still have so many questions and yet I know that God is with me in this.

I have learned so much here that I know now that God is with me, it's because I did some programs here. I've done the 14 steps to healing and they helped me so much. I did the manycalledfewchosen and I found out that my real passion is in prophecy and music. I did the Spiritoftruth which gave me so much more intimacy with God. I just love the studies here, I might not be the most regular member, but everytime I come back on this site I feel welcome.

I'm thinking about some other studies to follow, the virtuous woman one and maybe the one about incest, I don't know yet. I do know that my wings are getting stronger and that I will fly out one day