Fending Off Loneliness

[realtmg]

Alcoholism has been described as "the lonely disease," and very few recovered alcoholics argue the point. Looking back at the last years or months of our drinking, literally hundreds of thousands of us remember feeling isolated even when we were among a lot of happy, celebrating people. We often felt a deep sense of not belonging, even when we cheerfully acted sociable.

If we felt guilty or ashamed of either our drunkenness itself or anything we did while drinking, that compounded our feeling of being an outcast. At times, we secretly feared or even believed that we deserved ostracism, because of the things we did. "Maybe," many of us thought, "I really am an outsider."

The lonely road ahead looked bleak, dark, and unending. It was too painful to talk about; and to avoid thinking about it, we soon drank again.

Although some of us were lone drinkers, it can hardly be said that we completely lacked companionship during our drinking days. People were all around us. We saw, heard, and touched them. But most of our important dialogues were entirely interior, held with ourselves. We were sure nobody else would understand. Besides, considering our opinion of ourselves, we were not sure that we wanted anybody to understand.

But we know now that we do not have to proceed all on our own. It is far more sensible, safer, and surer to do it in the company of the whole happy fleet going in the same direction. And none of us need feel any shame at all at using help, since we all help each other.

It is no more cowardly to use help in recovering from a drinking problem than it is to use a crutch if you have a broken leg. A crutch is a beautiful thing to those who need it, and to those who see its usefulness.

Thoughts of a drink seem to "sneak" into our minds much more smoothly and slyly when we are "alone". And when we feel lonesome, and any urge for a drink strikes, it seems to have special speed and strength.

Such ideas and desires are much less likely to occur when we are with other people, especially other nondrinkers. If they do occur, they seem less potent and more easily put aside while we are in touch with fellow A.A. members. come here and chat with someone, or post your thoughts in a Forum.

We are not forgetting that almost everyone occasionally needs some time to himself, or herself, to collect thoughts, take stock„ get something done, work out a private situation, or just vacation from the stress of the usual day. But we have found it dangerous to become too indulgent about this, especially when our mood becomes a bit morose or self-pitying. Almost any company is better than a bitter privacy.
y day
Loneliness has been a big issue with me and slowly I have learned how to deal with it day by day with God's help.
HE is my FRIEND.

GBU

Real......

Tell somebody, fast. That at least starts to relieve the loneliness.

[dema]

Wherever you go, there YOU are. I think a lot of the problem with substance addiction is that the person doesn't enjoy his/her own company. And that is the greatest loneliness there is.

A lot of that stems from not being cherished in childhood. You are lovable. God loves you. If you can grasp how much God loves YOU, then maybe you can find comfort in your own company.

This isn't trying to oversimplify -this is a big, deep complicated thing.

And I wish you the best in finding the friend who sticketh closer than a brother - and the comfort of his companionship in introducing you to you. (Not so much for just you Real. I know you have come a long way.)

[Shan]

Real,

Thank you for sharing, my brother and papa are alcoholics and your posts help me to understand them a little more. God bless you and keep you.

In Christ,
Shan

[realtmg]

Getting involved with people who have the same problem and overcomes them daily can/will help you and them.
Learning to live a NEW way of living requires help from others and from our MAKER.
I have learned to get alone with HIM in times and He will help when you least expect it.
He loves you and me.
He is my FRIEND.
He allows us to think/feel He is far away or is not listening, BUT, HE is allowing us to grow and have faith and hope.
There is Hope if we are willing to change a little and humble ourselves.
Let HIM be GOD and may we listen /wait on Him.
We share a common bond if you have a problem of an addiction of some kind.
Pray!!!!!!!!

GBU All,

Real..........