Day One
Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2009 3:04 pmDid you know that if a married woman, who is being physically abused by her husband in a marriage, approaches her pastor, preacher, Religious leader or even another Christian that 9 times out of 10 she will be told that by the LAW of the Bible she has to stay in that marriage?
They even go on to say that if she flees the fear, pain and suffering that she endures, day in and day out, that she will sin against GOD.
Well, well, well, the Pharisees are back!
THIS IS NOT TRUTH !!!
It must be nice sitting in a righteous marriage and passing judgment on another who became entangled in someone's web of deceit and fell in love only to find they had made a mistake and married a monster.
I oft times wonder if it was THEIR own child living in fear and pain ...
If they would pass such a judgment.
This is exactly what I was taught growing up in a certain denomination. My mother was divorced, so there was always this "shadow of condemnation" looming over our heads. (as a kid i was always at every alter call, every Sunday cause i just knew i'd done something that week that was gonna cause me to burn up in that place called Hell- i think they saved a place for me at the alter call
) This condemnation, I believe was a big part of my mom's depression and self-loathing. I met my ex-husband when I was 16. I secretly dated him because he was several years older than I and seemed to have all the answers. He was a christian..at least he went to church. As soon as I turned 18 I left home and married him. Months later, when I was close to 6 months pregnant, my husband decided he would go for a job interview. He didn't return for a month. His mother informed me after the first 24 hours of his being gone, that he had gone back to his ex-wife. A month later he called and asked if he could come home. Of course, shamed as I felt, married, pregnant, taught that divorce was wrong, I took him back. There were several times this man cheated with other women..to the point where I wondered what was wrong with me...what was I not doing as a wife? What was I not doing enough of? No matter what I tried, he cheated. It finally got to the point, because of what Id been taught.."till death do we part" that I began praying.....Lord either take him, or take me from this world. I had been informed by my doctor that i should be tested for AIDS because of my husband's infidelities.
While in the hospital, ill with stress, the pastor of my church came to visit. He brought a book with him and then later sent the women of the church to council with me about the marriage. I found God's truth..so unlike what I'd been taught all my life. When I was released from the hospital, I took the kids and went to my mother's. Although I had found the Lord's truth...that had I listened to Him to begin with, I would not have married this man (there were many signs I ignored along the way) and that this marriage was and had never been blessed by the Lord, the enemy kept whispering to me....divorce is wrong. One day in prayer, knowing my husband was going to move to another state, I asked the Lord...what if I'm wrong? What if You did bless this marriage and I just have to wait for You to work things out....His answer to me was...Don't you think I know how to call him back from (this other state) if it be My will for this marriage to be? Still, out of that same old fear and the enemy whispering to me that I would be alone for the rest of my life, I went back to him. Months later, my best friend informed me that she had just delivered my husband's son. Needless to say, I filed for divorce.
Long story, I know.....but I know now that this marriage was never meant to be. I know that it was not a holy union blessed by the Lord...and if I am to remain unmarried for the rest of my life, so be it. Whatever His will is. He knows the desires of my heart...but His will in my life is now so much more important than my desires.
Momof3
