Pines Pages

[Dora]

I love the lake. It's so peaceful.

This is Lake Michigan at one of the beaches near where we live.
It's actually cold so the beach is vacant.
I love it there the best when it is empty.
I walked a little crooked. I think I got distracted by the birds and clouds and waves.

[Dora]

Is 4:9 I took you from the ends of the earth,
from its farthest corners I called you.
I said, You are my servant';
I have chosen you and have not rejected you.

~I am HIS servant. Though others reject me HE does not.~


Is 4:10So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

~I will not fear! I will not be dismayed. Even through a storm HE is with me, HE will help me through all these things. Through HIM I will receive strength. HE is my God. I serve HIM alone.~


Is 4:11All who rage against you
will surely be ashamed and disgraced;
those who oppose you
will be as nothing and perish.


Is 4:12Though you search for your enemies,
you will not find them.
Those who wage war against you
will be as nothing at all.

~When someone comes against me GOD takes notice.~

Is 4:13For I am the LORD, your God,
who takes hold of your right hand
and says to you, Do not fear;
I will help you.

~Amen~

Gods good and perfect will be done in ALL things. May forgiveness reign with in my heart and the hearts of others who are affected. Peace..Grace..Mercy and Love...

[Dora]

No matter the struggle HE really is the key to them all.

God is so good. I feel Him with me.

Why in the world do I get so anxious about the little things in life. And really aren't they all pretty little.

I've been such a bundle of nerves that I can't hardley eat and when I do I get sick.

And here all along the answer is to just let go and let God. To trust. To be the child.

I'm scared of tomorrows battle. The morning seems to be filled with a lot of worry and fear. Like ravens coming at me on all sides.

Yesterday I just kept saying thank you for being with me. It's all I could seem to say to Him.

So began a journal of all the thoughts that are haunting me. And each one had an answer. He was the way out.

Trust when I don't see. Trust in His people. Forgive all. Including self.

Here I'm typing away and the thought of my daughter going out of the country with out me or her dad pops up. Yikes! I suspect since it's already trying to cause me to stress the fear must have no real basis. It's not from the Lord. Soooooooooo relax mom.

Had guitar lessons tonight. Most of the time was spent with her praying for me. I cried. I hate crying in public. But it was such a release.

So anyhow, all is well, despite my determination to make bad of good situations.

Worry does indeed look around.

I can do this! I am doing it! Through HIM who strengthens me.

[Dora]

Driving to church this morning we drove our normal route past a farm of Eddy who passed away summer before last. I miss Ed. There standing in the small field near his home was sunflowers dried up, and waiting their final destination. To be plowed under in the spring.

Last year there wasn't any sunflowers. Cause Eddy planted them to "help make the world a beautiful place," and also because he found out his wife loved sunflowers.

Apparently his son missed the sunflowers after Eddys death and so his son planted the field with sunflowers this year. Earlier in the year when we saw that he had done this I couldn't hold back the tears. What a beautiful thing.

Another beautiful thing is how God works. Sometimes I hurts terribly. But if we keep our eyes on Him (hard to do) we come out the other side stronger and wiser. Along the way I shared with Him that I feel like mud. The words barely left my lips when I saw a vision. Jesus putting mud on the eyes of the sick and healing them. So if I'm mud, He can use me. Perhaps it's best to be mud, then I don't get in his way.

He's shown me so much this past few days and has done so much! I'm excited to see where He takes me next. He's shown me so many beautiful things. They are treasures with in my heart.

One step farther away from me, and one step closer to Him.

[Dora]

Well that excited like chocolate sorta of wavered as the sugar and caffeine wore off. But as I now know what I am missing, I know how to get back there and can get my fix once again. Feels like an emotional roller coaster.

We are leaving to go visit my family. That is a whole nother emotional roller coaster. Though I will cry like a baby when I get to see them and hold them and I'll cry with a broken heart when I have to say goodbye. I'm no longer afraid of their rejection because they have received the Holy Spirit and I know if things go wrong, He will repair it. Cause He is good like that. I just have to make sure I am doing His bidding every step of the way and pray the enemy doesn't bring up the past. This trip the hardest part will be returning to the area again. Not sure I'll ever get past that bothering me. I know now that cubby knows it is difficult for him to. When we pass an area he tenses up and does other little things that I know are clues that something is bothering him. I hate that my things effect him.

[Mercy7]

Hey Pine, awwe sis, i think thats what happens when ya get married you share your problems and bear it withthem, sound like you have a awesome husband, PTL for that. I will be keeping you in my prayers for your trip pine.
God will be with you and guide your words sis, lean on Him
stay strong in the Lord my friend
love you pine hugs

[Dora]

Thank you Holy!

Love ya sister

I refuse to live in fear. The thoughts that bring fear are not going to be what happens in this trip. I'm going to have a fabulous time with my family.

[Poefenjaf]

Keep on keeping on mah Pine-nuttiest!

Love ya sis!

[Dora]

Poe I just saw this. I'm sorry.

*glomp* I love you 2


Been a while since I've been here on Pines Pages.

In 300 words or less...Gods calling me to open take my blinders off and open my eye, to look around and see what He has for me...He's revealed Himself in amazing ways once again..love it when He does that. He's drawn my heart to a small church in MO. We spent 8 hours there Sunday before Thanks Giving and walked away feeling as if we belong there..Cubby and I were in unison over this church and both are on fire to help them any way we can to meet their needs which brought on talk of moving down to MO. If that happens I believe God will bring me through a huge growth. I've grown tremendously over this past month. I feel much less wobbly in my spiritual life. Though I feel I've fallen from Him. Time will tell. I'm either stubborn and going my own way or He's leading and more is coming.

Played guitar at the library with a group for people waiting for Santa. I didn't know I was playing for Santa till I got there!!! We had a lot of secular songs we played which drew people in..then we played spiritual song mixed in and I could see the spirit moving and their hearts turning toward God when they were reminded the season isn't about the big guy in a red suit, but the BIG Guy upstairs. Was amazing to watch!!!! We play again Sunday. I'm excited!!!

Last night I had my last Early Childhood Education class for the year. Mandatory for keeping my license. I hate these classes because there seems to be so little information given that I don't already know. It just seems like common since to me. But last night was different. I learned how very important my job is!!!!!!! I nearly cried. I could go into detail but the class was 3 hours so I don't think I can even begin to explain.

And I've already surpassed 300 words.

He loves ya...and so do I!

[Dora]

I took my middle child out to eat for some special mother son time.

We went to a china restaurant. A favorite of both of us.

With the bill they always give a fortune. I don't put much stock in them. Actually no stock at all. Meaning I don't believe in them.

Todays fortune I read over a few times, folded it flat and put it in my wallet.

It reads.....
Stop searching forever. Happiness if just next to you.

I stop to consider those in my life and it is right, there is happiness.

I'm very blessed. God is so good. I often stop to reflect at what life was and what life is and I'm amazed at what He gave me.

23 years ago I was on my way to a life no one would want. Probably death. Most certainly death. I said one little prayer and God rushed in. He turned it all around 100 degrees and gave me so much more than I ever deserved.

Don't loose hope. Better is only a prayer away. He is so very good. He desires to bring us abundant life.

Chin up and praise. Every moment I'm amazed in Him.

[Dora]

Wasn't going to go to church today because cubby wasn't feeling well.

My kids wanted to go so I took them. I felt a bit strange going in alone. Gave out a few hugs to some elderly friends. Love them to pieces and they always seem so happy to see me. Well almost always. One couple has prayed for me since I was born. They knew my parents during the brief time my mom and dad lived here when I was a baby. I tried not to be sad when they began to forget my name. They began to greet me with, "There she is!" Their voice still held the same excitement but I knew by the look in her eyes she couldn't come up with my name. Even though she has for many many years not hesitated to say my name. I know they recognize my face but my name escapes them. I'm just glad they remember their children and grand children even though to me they were like adopted grandparent. They were there when I was born, when I returned to MI, when I married, when my children were born, with every celebration and every struggle they were there. I was so happy when I was greeted with by my name this time! Just like she use to. They always make me feel so special. It doesn't matter who's around they want to know how I am. No one can distract them. I never let on if anything is wrong. I don't want them to worry. I can always tell when things aren't ok with them. There's always a look in her eye. She tries so hard to not share so I wont worry about her. But I can feel it in her spirit that she needs prayer. She loves many and loves deeply. She always greets me with a hug. With each hug I consider how much I'll miss her when she isn't there.

I gathered a half a dozen hugs. One was from the pastors wife who mentioned she loved my broche. I shared with her it was given to me by my mother and her face lit up. She knew my mother from the time I was born. Then I made my way to my usual seat. Left side, second row back. Two seats in, first seat is where cubby always sits. After I sat down and began to fumble the bulletin all I could think of is cubby will want to know so and so needs prayer and so and so is i the hospital. The pastor began to share the struggles of other congregational member, I jotted down notes because Cubby would want to know who needs prayer. Then I glanced to my right and realized even though cubby wasn't there I saved his seat for him. How sad. At that moment I felt so out of place and lonely. I looked behind me to my left and there sat a woman who's husband passed this year. She's not much older than I am. Despite her struggle she stands strong and continues day after day. But I wondered if at home at night if she crumbles and cries. Her daughter sang a Christmas song. My eyes teared. This was the first Christmas with out her daddy, yet she found the strength to sing for us. Such brave strong people determined to continue in His service till the day they go home.

Was a wonderful service. I took notes for cubby. As soon as I got home I rushed in to tell him all about church and see if he felt better.

We went to his families house to celebrate Christmas. I had a wonderful time. Everyone was trying hard to understand each other instead of eager to be offended.

Was a good day filled with people I love. God is good.

[kimby]

So glad to hear the day with the family went well! Sounds like that is another precious memory from this Christmas to write down and treasure! Rejoicing with you at the gift of your name; I truly grasp how special that moment was for you!