secrets


I'm sorta new here. Been here on an off. To make a long story short...This is whats going on. ...
I have an elderly neighbor I've known all my life since I was a kid. (I'm 44 now) she has always considered my sister an I her daughters.
my neighbor has a neice that i met last year. we hit it off great. we like to be with each other. she is older than i so I call her "mom". i dont have any parents so having Mama Jo is a hugh blessing to me. A parent in my life is what i need so much right now . even if i am in my 40's.

this has gotten my elderly neighbor all in a knot. she absolutely does NOT want us together. i never knew why..........till now.
neighbor is in a rehab / nursing home for a while. she was hurt and now has pneumonia. i went to visit her yesterday (sat) i take her her mail and watch over her house.
we were filling out a couple of checks and she got VERY serious with me. telling me what we talk about is to only be between the 3 of us. (My sister, Lu and I) so i was like "ok. i understand" (but didn't promise anything). then she just went off about her wishes. that she wants us to have everything she has if / when she dies. (she is 95) she was telling me all kinds of stuff about her neice that i have a very hard time believing.

this is very upsetting to me. i dont' know if i'm making sence but its NOT FAIR that lu dumped all this on me and expects me to keep quiet. not tell ANYONE. i have told her neice some stuff but not the specific things lu said to absolutely tell no one.
this isn't fair. i've never done anything to Lu. all i ever wanted was to feel like i had a mom again. i have a hard enough time living with depression and borderline personality disorder.
'mom" thinks i should get this off my chest and just tell her everything lu told me not to tell. i must say i am thinking about it alot. i don't owe lu anything. she's told lies her whole life so this shouldn't be a surprise but it is to me.
i feel like i can't trust ANYONE. i dont' know what to do. i've been crying about it on an off for 2 days. asking God "WHAT should I do?" i think and need to just write my "mom" everything. they know how lu is so this won't be to surprising to her and her husband anyways.