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The Truth of Alissa Lynne
By Alissa Lynne – Purple Butterfly of Christ


 

The Truth of Alissa Lynne
Alissa Lynne – Purple Butterfly of Christ

 

Disclaimer: The names in this book are fictitious names, changed to protect the innocent. I am not responsible for your actions after reading this book. If you do not wish to be bound to the above statements, return the book to me. God Bless

 

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Part One - The “Real” Truth of Alissa Lynne 

Chapter 1 - Early Years (Birth/Childhood/Teenage Years)
Chapter 2 - Young Adult – Adulthood
Chapter 3 – Marriages
Chapter 4 - Mother’s Influences

Part Two - The Truth of Alissa Lynne - Thoughts 

Chapter 5 - Alissa Lynne’s Truths – The Beginning
Chapter 6 - Alissa Lynne’s Truths – Self Esteem
Chapter 7 - Alissa Lynne’s Truths – Faith/Trust
Chapter 8 - Alissa Lynne’s Truths – Building a Relationship w/ God
Chapter 9 - Alissa Lynne’s Truths – Encouragement
Chapter 10 - Alissa Lynne’s Truths – Fellowship/Life
Chapter 11 - Alissa Lynne’s Truths – In Poetry
 
Chapter 12 - Alissa Lynne’s Truths – The Ending & a New Beginning

Special Message to Single Women
Author's Last Words
Web Page Listings

Inspiring Women on the Internet

 

Chapter 6

Alissa Lynne’s Truth – Self Esteem

 

 

What are you worth?

Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

As a human being, trying to do those verses is sometimes the hardest thing to do. It is a daily struggle for me. It is hard but God will show you how, when you do, what wonders He will do for you, for we let go and let God work in our lives. I am thankful that I know my faults and growing in Christ I am able to recognize the faults and be able to take them to God and ask Him to mold me in the way that He wants me to be.

I thank God for giving me the strength to look in the mirror and see the “real” Alissa every morning. I am thankful to God that when I look in the mirror every morning that I actual like the woman staring back at me, I see a woman that is kind, caring, loving, compassionate, passionate, sweet, and gentle. I see a beautiful woman who needs to do her hair more often and stop being lazy. I used to look in the mirror and see nothing but negative and never knew what I was worth. I thank God for coming into my life for I look in the mirror and see a blessed and truly happy woman staring back at me. I am not saying that all my days are perfect; I still have trust issues with those around me and thank God for molding me to change.

I know that there are many of us out there, whom due to the things that have gone on in our lives; do not trust those around us. We have to turn that all over to Jesus and though it may sound easy – it is not that easy but it is oh so worth it when we do. God will take you to that next level and things that were hard before are no longer hard and there are new challenges and things facing you that you have been given in life. I look at the new challenges as a place where I get to learn more about Jesus. I thank God for even though there are days that nothing seems to go right in my mind – God will keep me sane. See, I was at the point in my life when I was looking in the mirror and hating the woman I saw there. I saw nothing good in her and saw nothing that I liked in the slightest way. I thought I was worthless that I was of no value or concern to anyone – including my family. I felt that I could not help anyone let alone help myself. I did not see a reason for living or giving anyone any of my love – what was love to me then – love was nothing but a word that held no meaning. I was so lost in the world and so far from God – but God saw fit to bless me to hear and understand His calling on my life, God saw someone worth it, someone who needed His love and who needed to love and to understand love.

So as the question was posed – what are you worth?

I am a beautiful child of God who struggles every day with walking the straight and narrow path of Christ, but I know that God is with me and I know that God will keep me and I know that God will send encouragement when needed. God will use me to encourage others when needed – which in turn strengthens me. I praise God for He is so good to me and I am thankful to God for He sees me worthy of His love – so yes, I am worth it and yes, I will continue to praise God always. I am a child of the King, I am a follower of Christ and I am worth it – we must believe that we are blessed and highly favored and I thank God for showing me that I am worth more than I ever thought I was. I can stand tall and know that no matter what comes my way – God is with me always and to know that everything works out for my good for that is in His word. (Romans 8:28)

Philippians 4:4:13 Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, Rejoice. Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand. Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you. But I rejoiced in the Lord greatly, that now at the last your care of me hath flourished again; wherein ye were also careful, but ye lacked opportunity. Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.  

Romans 8:28-32 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brethren. Moreover whom he did predestinate, them he also called: and whom he called, them he also justified: and whom he justified, them he also glorified. What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us? He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things?  

So many people are in excellent shape physically because they regularly work out at the gym, working those muscles and building their bodies. We are to work out our spiritual muscles by working out our faith, by trusting in the Lord and having faith that He will do what is necessary for us to make it through the day. I have started to love working out my faith. I know that God is awesome and He has done so many awesome things in my life already that I know that God is with me and that all I have to do is sit back and wait upon the Lord!!! I am exercising my faith and my relationship with the Lord is strengthening – I love it for that makes each circumstance that comes at me just a little easier to deal with!!! Praise God!

There are times that we actually want to wallow in the self-pity, or the pain, or the anger – that is the enemy trying to block your blessings of receiving more faith, trust and love for Jesus. We have to remember that despite all things – the enemy is always trying to defeat us in the good that God is giving us. We have to remember that God is with us and will always be with us and that we should praise Him always for all things big and small for that will bring us closer to Him and it will lessen our pain and our hurt!

I say all this to my sisters because so many times we cry out to the Lord that we want someone to hold us and to love us. Well God will do so in His own time and I believe that He will when we stop focusing on the man and focus on our relationship with the Lord. Let God pick the man for you and let the Lord give you what you need as when He does He will give you some – if not all your wants. If God would not have had my sweetie and I met the way we did – I am not sure I would have talked to him for he was not my “type” I am 5ft 7 in – he is 5ft 4in – that would have disqualified him right there. He loves the Lord and he treats me the way a woman should be treated and I pray that I will always be blessed with him and if it is God’s will, I will be!

My sisters – trust in the Lord and Let go/Let God – concentrate on getting you ready to be a wife to the right man. It is not easy and it is not going to be a bed of roses but as long as God has blessed it – it will be right. You may not be getting the man of your dreams because you are not ready for the man of your dreams. You may not really be committed to the Lord, as you should be. There was a story that I read somewhere – I think it was in one of my groups.  There was a man who was praying for a wife and he prayed to God and had a long list of good qualities such as nice, kind, understanding, patience and loving…well the man was waiting and waiting – so he asked God why did the woman not come. God told him why would God send him a woman who was kind, when he was mean, understanding, patience and loving when he was not those things – that he needed to work on himself before God would bless him with the woman he was requesting. I believe that to the core – we have to be what we want – we cannot ask for the best when we are not willing to be the best! Hold out my sisters – work on you and your relationship with the Lord and watch the blessings flow and one of them might be that man you want. However, if it is not the case guess what? Your relationship will be stronger in the Lord and you will understand why it is not that way.

As my relationship with God is growing more each day, I am amazed at the love that I feel inside of me that I know is God loving me and caring for me. I have never felt this kind of love before in my life. We were commanded to love God with all we have.

Matthew 22:36-38

King James Version

Master, which is the great commandment in the law?  Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment.

New International Version

Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?"Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment.”

Young's Literal Translation

Teacher, which [is] the great command in the Law?' And Jesus said to him, `Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thine understanding -- this is a first and great command;

When I look at my life, I see things that I never noticed before. I am the way I am because of life experiences, I am learning to love myself, love God, and to love others as God would have me to do. He wants us to love each other as He loves us. It is not as easy as it sounds; we have to love the drunk, the drug addict, the prostitute, our family, and our enemies, those that despise us, those that say they love us and do not. We have to love every one – those that are out to hurt us. I am so glad that God has laid that on my heart, as I think that the key of starting to love all these people is to love ourselves and let God love us and feel His love for us. As we start to feel the love of Christ in our lives, we cannot help but love each other. We cannot help but love everyone we meet. God wants us to just love each other as He loves us. People ask what is wrong with the world today, well Satan is real, but so is God – we need to stand and trust God and love. The key to me is the love, all about the love. We have to let the love fill us up and just let it flow from our hearts, from our minds, from our mouths and just love one another. I just cannot express this enough, we must love each other, there is no time to hate, and there is not time to hold onto past feelings. God does not stop loving us because of our past, He wipes the slate clean and each time, He loves us unconditionally, He wants us to love each other in the same manner.

So many times, I have come across people who do not know their worth. They do not know how special they truly are. I am one of those people who can see the good even in the bad of people. I married two men because I could do that, yes a great trait that can be self destructive if you do not listen to God and not marry whom He tells you to marry.

I have been blessed to come out of the kind of past that I had and love the woman I see in the mirror but so many have been through so much pain, look in the mirror, and cannot stand that person. They look in the mirror and wonder what others see. I have come across many bitter people, who are still hurting. If you are walking through life and people are saying that you are hard, stern or even tell you that you are mean, it could be that you are holding onto pain and hurt still. I was one of those people.

JESUS is the only way to get rid of that pain, that searing pain in your very being that is affecting your every day life. You cannot stay in a relationship, you do not get along with people, or you just keep to yourself. Jesus is the only way to end that cycle. You have to let go and let God work on your heart.

I look in the mirror and see my worth – for I am worthy due to the blood that was shed for me on Calvary! I thank God for when He looks upon me, He sees that blood and not me!

I am worthy because of the love that He has for me and the love He has bestowed upon me. I am worthy because He said I am!

If you are suffering from pain and hurt, know that you do not have to go that route; Jesus can heal your very soul and pain. Trust in the Lord and He shall never leave you.

We are all in this together – you are worthy – you are worthy – you are worthy!

It is not easy, there are times that I have not let it go and I lash out in pain at those around me. I thank God for giving me a man who understands that. I love him but I am human and sometimes he says things that just work my last nerve. Why is it that he is working my nerves? It is because not all the love is manifested in my heart at that time. I have to wake up every morning fighting the enemy so that it does not take over my heart that day. I wake up in the morning praying to God, reading His word, listening to gospel music all the time. I go to work listening to my gospel music, come into work and listen to my sermons and gospel music all day. Hummm but even then I am fighting for all it takes is 1 minute away from that and the enemy attacks, sometimes it gets the best of me for a minute and some times I run so fast away from it that it does not even have a chance to catch me for days. I am thanking God that I still wake up every morning fighting that enemy off and putting on the full amour of God. I am thanking God that sometimes it may be hard but God is with me. I thank God that I know what I am worth. I am a child of the King and I shall be given hinds feet and lifted up away from my enemies.

I love my life because despite all the trials and tribulations that I go through, all it does is bring me closer to Jesus.  

I love my life because I am walking in the light of the Lord and I will praise Him always for He continues to bring me through the darkness! 

I love my life for I am a mother of a beautiful son, who is the cutest son on the planet earth. God has blessed me with a child who when he smiles he lights up not just my heart but also all those around him. He is truly a blessing from God. 

I love my life for I am a sister to not just my siblings but to all I meet. I treat all those I meet as my family for in my heart they are. 

I love my life for I am a survivor and conquer of the things that have happened in my life, God has blessed me even when I did not know Him as I know Him now. 

I love my life for as I look at all that I have, I realize that I have an abundance of love in my life, and without love I would be nothing. 

I love my life for I have a job, I have a car, and I have the things that I need to get through life with a little more ease. There are people who are jobless and without a car and would love to trade places with me. 

I love my life for I have the use of my body, sure it aches and it hurts from time to time but I am blessed to be able to walk most time, I am blessed to be able to do what I need to do, I may do it a little slower but God is blessing me to continue on in His name and do what I need to do to provide for my family. 

I love my life for I am blessed and I am highly favored. I am truly a child of the Lord and I am able to call on Him whenever I want to call on Him and He will hear my prayer 

I love my life for God is in charge of my life and has made all the things that I love in my life and about my life possible.  

 What do you love about your life? Are you thankful for where you are in your life right now? Do you know that God is here for us and that we should be thankful every single day of our lives and not change the way we think because the season of the year changes? We should be children of God all the time and bless those around us with the word of God and the love of God inside of us.  May you accept God’s blessing for you and be thankful that He is with us every day and show Him that you are thankful for His love. God Bless! I love you all!

 

CONTINUE TO CHAPTER SEVEN

 

Published by: Alissa Lynne – Verona, PA

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or by any information storage and retrieval system, without written permission from the author, except for the inclusion of brief quotations in a review.

Copyright © 2007 Alissa Lynne – Purple Butterfly of Christ - All rights reserved

First Edition, 2007

Published in the United States of America


 

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