GUILTY BYSTANDER MEANING
INCEST GUILT BY ASSOCIATION
Welcome to our Christianity Oasis Quest For Blest Rest From Incest study program. This is our Guilty Bystander Warning against Incest Guilt by Association. The truth within this absolutely awesome Guilty Bystander program will truly enhance and enLIGHTen your be-YOU-tiful and YOU-nique life.
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STATE OF CONFUSION
ENTERING STATE OF REALIZATION
A NOTE TO THE GUILTY BYSTANDER
GUILTY BYSTANDER COUNSELING
INCEST GUILT BY ASSOCIATION LESSON
someone confide in you that they were being abused?
Maybe they didn't use the word abuse, but you knew
what they were trying to tell you. Maybe
they didn't come to you at all, but you suspect
something horrible is happening. Something
just doesn't seem right with them.
stopping you from helping them?
Abuse happens everyday. AT LEAST four children die A DAY
from abuse. Statistics can show outrageous numbers of
how many are abused, how they are abused, who it was
from, etc. But in reality, the statistics only show ⅓
of it all. Too many times, people see it happening and
don't call. Too many times people suspect something, and
they don't ask. Too many times people see the evidence
and the proof, but turn away. There are even times that
a victim has told people (friends, teachers, etc) in
hopes of finding help ... And the person doesn't do
anything. They sit back, might give them a hug or a
shoulder to cry on here and there ... But doesn't do
anything to stop it.
For those that know the
deep dark secret of a child and refuse to do anything:
How dare you KNOW something is going on and look the
other way. The nerve to say "there is nothing I can do."
There is A LOT you can do. Just by speaking up. By
helping the victim get OUT of the abuse. By helping that
fearful child by being their voice.
You are now in fault and ALLOWING the abuse to happen.
You and the abuser have become a team. Working together
against the child by keeping them in silence.
One of the most horrifying effects of child abuse is the
tendency to repeat itself. One of every 3 abused victims
BECOMES an abuser. So by allowing your fear or apathy to
keep you silent, is allowing not just one child to be
abused and killed in their silent cries, but to allow
the abuse to possibly continue the ANOTHER generation as
But you don't want to interfere in someone else's life?
You don't think you are involved in this? The MOMENT you
found out or suspected the abuse, you became involved.
There is no way around it. Just because you close your
eyes and ears and pretend it isn't happening, doesn't
make it go away. Often times, when we close our eyes or
look away, the situation has the potential to become
You don't believe that speaking up and reporting the
abuse will do any good? Better safe than sorry. That one
time you chose NOT to call, usually results in some of
the most severe cases. That child will continued to be
touched, raped, hurt, and shamed because you didn't
think you could help.
Even if you SUSPECT something, please report it.
You don't want to report it because you don't want to
break up that family? Yeah, you're right. Leaving that
family with a scared, raped, self harming, soon to be
(if not already) suicidal child is a lot better than
HELPING that family get the help they need. NO. I just
pray the child stays alive long enough for everything to
If you are a parent and you know your child is being
molested, the longer you wait, the closer they get to
death. Children do not suffer through abuse without the
effects that it causes on the heart and body. It will
affect every aspect of their life. Knowing they can't
trust anyone and thinking every person is just like
their abuser. How dare you allow a child to live through
life (if they chose not to kill themselves) with those
thoughts tucked away in their heart because YOU decided
not to help. You have become just one more person they
will never be able to trust. If you can live with
yourself knowing that you are risking the LIFE of your
child, then so be it. You will reap what you sow. God
GUILTY BYSTANDER WARNING
INCEST GUILT BY ASSOCIATION DANGER
For those that know the secrets, have heard the silent
screams, and truly want to help:
If you have someone tell you something that is either
abuse or suspected abuse, first stay calm. If they see
YOU freak out, then they won't know how to react and
might withhold information.
When they finally work up the courage to
come to someone and tell them, (no matter how much or
little information they share), it will absolutely
destroy them if you doubt what they are sharing. In
response to your doubts, they might not decide to tell
anyone else and just suffer through the abuse until they
decide to end their life. Please don't let it get to
Don't interrogate them or ask them leading questions.
Just let them talk. You might take notes AFTER they
leave while the information is still fresh in your mind
so you don't misquote anything they say when you report
the abuse to HELP them. Taking notes in front them in
most cases causes them to clam up and not want to speak.
They wonder what you may be writing or they get tense
when they see their words on paper. You want them to be
able to speak as freely (and as much) as possible. When
you are short on words, let your actions speak. Listen
intently and be there for them. They need you and they
Reassure them they did NOTHING wrong. Let them know you
are going to help them and that whatever happens is to
help the abuse STOP. Let them know you support and
Remember, being a shoulder to cry on or ear to listen to
is not enough for them. They may THINK that's all they
need, but you know better. They need to get OUT of the
situation before it causes lifetime effects on them.
Whether you are promised to secrecy or not, you know the
way to keep them alive and safe is by reporting the
abuse. They are counting on YOU to help them. Do the
right thing lest you become the guilty bystander and are guilt by association
GUILTY BYSTANDER HELP
INCEST GUILT BY ASSOCIATION PREVENTION
Child Abuse Hotlines: Where to call to get
help or report abuse.
If you suspect a child is in immediate
danger contact law enforcement as soon as
To get help in the U.S., call:
To get help for child sexual abuse, call:
1 John 3:17
But whoso hath this world's good, and seeth
his brother have need, and shutteth up his
bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth
the love of God in him?
And he answering said, Thou shalt love the
Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with
all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and
with all thy mind; and thy neighbour as
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under the care of a doctor, or if you're taking prescription
medication for any reason, DO NOT discontinue it unless you have
orders from your doctor.
Jesus made this statement:
They that are whole need not a physician; but they that are sick.
This Scripture clearly suggests that even though Jesus
was using an analogy of a human physician to reveal that
He is the healer of the soul ... Jesus acknowledged that
there were human physicians needed for the body at times
when our body is sick. God works thru the hands of many
physicians. Just as God's Spirit will work thru this
program to heal your soul.
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