Christian Self Harm

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Everyone has done this in one form or another at some point in their life. Some have chosen to do it during certain phases of their life, but are able to escape it at will.

Others continued to do it often and it became an addiction yet were able to seek help and were able to overcome.

Still others do not seem to be able to find the help they need, despite searching and have fallen into a vicious cycle. They live in a darkness few would comprehend, much less understand the complexity thereof.

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• What do you do when you can not cope with things in your life? What do you do when do not want to cope?
• What do you when you feel the need to escape from the pressures of this world?
• What do you do when you feel like you deserve some kind of a punishment for something you feel that you have done wrong or have been wronged by another and blame yourself?
• What do you do when you want to focus your mind on anything other than what is going on in your life at that very moment, unable to see past that moment?

Some people get so very overwhelmed that they just want to scream. So, they do. And afterwards, they feel better. It was a release of tension for them. Everything that was built up within was able to come out through a simple scream.

Some punch their pillows. All of their energy and frustration is taken out on a pillow, and it helps them.

Some people exercise as a means of taking out their frustration.

Others take out their frustration on friends and family. Even turning to physical abuse.

Still others get so overwhelmed by what they are enduring and do not know how to release the tension, confusion and Spiritual anguish. From their perspective, being in physical pain would be more comforting to them than experiencing the emotional pain within.

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So ... They resort to self harm.

Alcohol Abuse, Drug Abuse, Cutting, Burning, Scratching, Banging, Biting, Purging ... The list goes on and on.

Now, some of you may be wondering why alcohol and drugs are on this list. It is simple, it is a slow destruction of the flesh. The temporal pleasure can cause serious destruction to vital organs, as time passes. As well as intoxicate you which can cause accidents and even death to others. Not to mention those periodic hangovers and nagging side and after effects.

Yes, these various methods of self harm are the choice of many souls who are enduring that which they believe they cannot cope with.

It might sound ridiculous and even unbelievable to some people, but to others, it is a means of temporary relief and escape from reality. Not a healthy way to find relief by any standards, but it is still relief in their confused and hurting state of mind and heart. These methods of self harm are temporal means of escape from this realm to another ...

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If you are not personally one who self harms, and you struggle to understand why they do it, keep this Verse in mind:

Just because we may not understand, never gives us the right to judge, criticize, or condemn another.

For those who do self harm, knowing why we do it is an important step in finding a way to overcome.

Each person is extremely different. Each person has their own reasons for self harm or believe they know why.

To others who may not know why they do, hopefully looking at potential root causes within this program, will help you discover why you do.

Keep in mind though, that many times the reason you started self harming is not the reason you may have continued to self harm.

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Why do people self harm?

Here are some reasons ...

• Everyone seems to be feeling so great all the time. No one wants to be around a "depressed" person. When nothing else worked, I tried cutting. I didn't go that deep. But when I found it focused my mind on my physical pain, rather than emotional pain ... What planned to be only one time, slowly became one time every day. Then a few times every day. I keep it hidden though. I don't want anyone to see. I don't want to be questioned by yet another perfect person that doesn't know a thing that's going on in my life. No one would understand anyway.
• People are constantly making comments to me about my weight. Even the ones that don't say anything, I know they are thinking it.
• I'm tired of feeling numb. I want to feel alive again. I just want to feel ... Something. Anything.
• I've tried therapy. I've been to several different therapists and I still feel the same. I don't want to go to another one and have to start back at square one with my story. I'm tired of talking about it. I just want to feel better.
• I lost my job. I lost my spouse. I can't pay my bills. I need something to help me get through the day. I can't stand waking up in the morning and realizing that my life is like this.
• My parents are always on my back. They are always asking what's wrong ... But I can't tell them. They wouldn't understand. My siblings always holler and scream when they are angry or upset. My mom told me she wishes I would do that ... Instead of keeping it inside and just taking it out on myself.
• I don't have a drinking problem. Yes, I might drink almost every night ... Or every night ... But I have control over it. It lets me just step away from the world for a while. I can't cope as well as others, so I need a little help. And alcohol started to help. At least I think it does. As long as I have something in me, it makes the day goes by a little better.
• Nobody wants me. I feel so ... Rejected and alone.
• I just want someone to ask me if I'm okay. Just ask me how I'm doing ... And mean it. Look past my fake smile. I just want to talk to someone. I want to get everything out. I have no one to talk to. So I started burning and cutting myself ... On places where I knew people would see. Ask me if I'm okay !!!
• I'm tired of being compared to everyone. Nothing I do is right anymore. Why doesn't anyone truly love me anymore? Was I a mistake? There are an abundant amount of reasons as to why one would fall victim to this trap of the mind and heart.
• Loss of someone you love, to death, abuse whether it be physical or sexual, to loss of a job, to loss of a friend or lover, to bad grades at school.
• Some of the people that harm themselves can't even truly identify why they do it. Some feel they have lost so much control in their lives, that they find control in what they can do to their own bodies.

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Hard to understand for some, easy to understand for others.

How do you feel when you have lost control of things? In situations where you have control taken from you or have surrendered it for whatever reason ... This can result from so many scenarios ... From being sexually abused or raped to a situation where the person feels they always let people down and can not do anything right anymore to a situation where a person is uncomfortable with how their body looks and since they feel they can't change it immediately, they find a way to feel some kind of control again.

Some feel they need to be punished. They feel so much shame, guilt, and regret from specific incident(s) that they can not completely understand and/or accept that God has already forgiven them when they truly repent, so they feel the need to be punished. In short ... They refuse to forgive themselves.

Some might not even know of or understand God's Grace, so any mistake or sin they commit, they punish themselves to try to con-vince themselves not to do the sin or make the mistake again.

But ... Doing the math, if the self harm becomes an addiction, some may choose to sin, just so they can self harm again.

Some self harm can also be a cry for help.

Others who do not have experience with self harm might look upon their situation and wonder why these hurting souls don't just ask someone for help.

In some cases they have or may have attempted to, and they were rejected (Or believe they were) of the help that they needed, for whatever reason.

In some cases they can not get the courage to ask someone for help.

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Still others do not feel that they have anyone to trust enough to ask for help, so they seek methods of self harm which will place marks upon their body such as cutting (in places that others can see the marks or scars such as their wrists or arms) where other people will see and naturally worry or question.

As odd as it sounds, some people harm themselves for attention. They do it to see who would worry about them.

Then there are those merely seeking companionship ... When someone comes and asks, "What's goin' on? Is everything okay?" ... The self harming soul feels like that person might actually be a worthy friend because they cared enough to ask.

Look at it this way ... Self injury is a way to express what someone is feeling when they can not find or do not have the words for how they feel. For example, a more powerful way to tell someone that you love them is by giving them a hug or a kiss ... An act of love. Sometimes words can't express how you feel about someone.

The same goes with frustration ... Words can not express the feelings of frustration, anger, shame, guilt, regret, etc, that someone feels ... So they put it into a physical act to try to express their feelings and get it out. It is how they feel inside.

Some people harm themselves as to be able to show people how they feel when they are scared to use their words.

Some people who can not cope well, slowly become numb to the world. They become almost like robots. Some people shut down completely and do not even want to get out of bed. Others still go to work or school, but express and even feel little to no emotion. They have shut down. They are hiding within.

Self harm victims believe that self injury gives a temporary feeling back to someone who feels numb. Many self injurers believe that they will "snap out" of the numbness that they begin to feel by forcing physical pain on their own bodies. So, they do.

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It feels at times like it's become part of your identity, doesn't it?

You feel like, though you may not like what you do, it's still part of who you are. So, you just give in to the temptation and just do it. You've just accepted it as part of your life. You don't want to die ... but you don't want to be alive. You hate your life so much that just to make it through one more day or even hour ... You try to get some kind of a "buzz." You just need a little push to make it a little longer.

You may feel like there was a time in your past that your free will was taken from you, so you give in now to pressure, temptation and every bad moment that you feel and try to temporally make it vanish by committing some kind of self injury.

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What started as a hobby became an addiction. Each mark is covered by another lie. Each scar has it's own story. You feel dead already so what's the worst that can happen? Once a cutter, always a cutter ... Right?

Are you sure about that?

Do not believe these lies.

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You may be one who does it, or know of someone who does and you can't grasp why someone would do that to themselves or wonder how you can help them to stop.

Maybe it is you and you want to quit ... Or maybe you do not want to quit, but want the desire to want to quit. You know it is not good to do, but you feel it helps too much and you can not find any other way to cope.

Don't you want to be free? Aren't you tired of allowing this to control you life?

Take your life back. Take control again. You can overcome this secret addition. There are other ways to deal and cope with things in your life, seeking attention from others, and overcoming shameful regrets.

Let's start fresh. Today is the first day of the rest of our lives. Let's choose to create a personal journal that only we can read and write in it each day.

In it, we can jot down our thoughts about the experiences of that day and/or what we want to focus on, such as anything which touched us or that we may want to remember. Also, for those thoughts or feelings that you are not able to share with others, but need to share with yourself and get it out of you so you can heal.

Each day, we will encounter and experience new opportunities of hope and Truth.

Christian Self Harm Recovery Summary

This Christian Self Injury Help journaling will help us remember the best parts of our healing journey and what we really want to remember for later and ask our self ... How can we apply what we have learned that day to our life right now.

Think about what we have talked about today and let's meet up tomorrow and continue to the next day to really find out the truth about ourselves.

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