HOW TO BE A SUPPORTIVE WIFE BIBLICAL ADVICE
HOW TO BE A BETTER WIFE JOURNEY
Welcome to our Christianity Oasis Virtuous Woman study program. This is our How to be a supportive wife study taking an in depth look into how to be a better wife. The absolutely be-YOU-tiful How to be a supportive wife message within will truly bring the LIGHT of Truth to your Christian walk path and become your candle in the cold and oft times lonely darkness.
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THE VIRTUOUS WOMAN
A RECIPE
STEP #15 |
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Welcome back ...
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Today's
Virtuous
Vitamin
is
~CONTENTMENT~
satisfied
with
one's
status |
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Proverbs
31 ...
Verse 23
Her husband
is known in
the gates,
when he
sitteth
among the
elders of
the land. |
HOW TO BE A SUPPORTIVE WIFE LESSON
HOW TO BE A BETTER WIFE STEPS
You're
doing a great job!
You're already halfway
through with the 28
Steps of this program,
and there's still plenty
of great TRUTH ahead!
You know, I can't help
but think about king
Lemuel again, and his
concerned mother when I
read this verse ... But
what does it mean to
you? Well, the gates,
may be referring to one
of two things ... In
Biblical times, many
cities had walls built
around them, and the
gates of course would be
the place where people
would enter and exit the
city, but the palaces,
where kings lived, also
had a wall around them
with a gate for entry
and exit, and it was
called the king's gate
... You'll find many
references to the
"king's gate" in the
Book of Esther. The
elders of the land,
would of course be older
men who were wise
through experience and
were leaders of the
people.
Now imagine, a man, who
has a good reputation,
is respected, and holds
a place of authority ...
What kind of woman would
he want to be known as
his wife? Does this make
you think back to the
story of Sir Gawain and
the Witch again?
Having a noble character
is very important to a
man, and being his
"other half" it's
important that a woman
be noble as well.
Now, let's talk about
your "king" and your
castle for a while. It's
a rough world out there,
and every ounce of
support that you offer
to your soul-mate is so
very important.
Behind every good man,
should stand a good
woman. There I go with
the old sayings again!
She does not desire his
administration though.
She is content to be a
woman, as God made her,
and to fulfill the moral
obligations of a
virtuous woman. She
doesn't lie in wait for
him to return home from
a day of earning a
living for the family,
to dump the children on
him and take a Calgon
bath because her life as
a homemaker is so rough
either.
No, she eagerly awaits
his return to their home
because she loves him,
cannot wait to see his
smiling eyes and takes
every opportunity she
can to make him as happy
as she can. She knows
how fortunate she is
that she is protected
from the world that he
deals with, day in and
day out, and always
shows her appreciation
of that fact.
HOW TO BE A SUPPORTIVE WIFE FOR GOD
HOW TO BE A BETTER WIFE ADVENTURE
Sure, everyone has a bad
day from time to time,
as we know,
but with the right
attitude, you will find
those days to be very
rare. Compare your day
with his. Most of the
events of his day are
beyond his control. Rush
hour traffic, nagging
boss, deadlines,
competitors, co-workers
... Not to mention all
the games that satan and
his cohorts throw in to
try and lure him to be
anything but a virtuous
man.
Your day, on the other
hand, is very much in
your own control.
Screaming children can
be turned into the
chortling of little
angel voices with a few
jars of finger paint and
a poster board. You get
to see the awe and
wonder of innocent faces
as you tell them the
story of Jesus' life, or
read them a Little
Golden Book. Even though
you've told them the
same stories a million
times, they still hang
on to your every
syllable.
You can choose when to
do laundry, cook, clean,
sew ... Anything you
wish. Best of all, you
can spend time with God,
whenever you want to,
and nobody can say a
word about it ...
EVER! Knowing that
he is returning to a
happy home at the end of
the day, your husband's
day in the "gates," will
be much easier to cope
with.
You're not only showing
your husband how much
you cherish him by
making his home his
castle, but you are
showing God as well. If
Jesus was watching,
would you miss a chance
to get your husband
something cool to drink
or have dinner ready
when he gets there?
Would you complain about
getting him his slippers
or making sure his
favorite chair didn't
have matchbox cars and
Playdoh all over it?
Would you be embarrassed
if there were dishes
piled in the sink and
trash billowing out of
the can? With the right
attitude, and love in
your heart, you'll find
that you feel like you
can't do enough for him.
With your betrothed
taking care of his work
outside the home, and
you, taking care of your
work inside the home,
that will leave you both
with more time to spend
together, and what
better recipe could
there be?
HOW TO BE A SUPPORTIVE WIFE TEACHING
HOW TO BE A BETTER WIFE INSTRUCTIONS
Oh, and one more thing
... Don't make it a
requirement for the love
of your life to say
thank you for every
little thing you do.
Chances are you don't
thank him for going to
work every day, or for
paying the mortgage, or
for providing groceries,
or for mowing the lawn.
There are things that
are just expected ...
From both sides of your
unity, and sometimes,
when one is feeling all
mushy and romantic, then
it's really cool to
express your
appreciation for a
certain thing, but don't
make it a job, or a
contest, or an
obligation ... That's
just not how love works.
SPEAKING OF RECIPES
There is another old
saying that I'm sure
you've heard before, and
I've noticed a lot of
women believe it's the
right recipe for finding
a man who truly loves
them. It goes something
like this: If you love
something, set it free
... If it comes back,
it's yours ... If it
doesn't, it never was
yours to begin with.
(That may not be word
for word, but you get
the idea.) Now, if
you're a TRUTH seeker,
you'll see that in
essence what this is
really saying is, if you
love a man, kick him to
the curb and if he comes
crawling back, then
you've got it made
sister.
BLECHHHHH!
THAT'S LOVE???
First off, if you truly
love someone, you
couldn't bear the idea
of being without them so
badly that this thought
would never be a
consideration, ever,
ever, EVER!
Secondly, what are you
trying to prove? That
you're tough as nails or
that nothing sways you?
(So what?) Maybe you're
one who will n EVEr
be controlled by a man.
In a whisper, God made
women to be controlled
by their man. Remember,
"and they desire shall
be to thy husband, and
he shall rule over
thee." (Genesis 3:16) Do you
suppose everyday life
doesn't test love
enough, that you have to
place the added burden
on your soul-mate that
you may, at will, "set
him free" to test his
love? That's
preposterous! ... But
very today's woman-ish.
If you practice this
"recipe" you're setting
up a foundation for
failure, in two ways:
1. You're forcing, in
the name of love, your
soul-mate to cower to
you, which makes him
lose self respect
and lose trust
in you, and ...
2. This subconsciously
and simultaneously makes
you lose respect for him
too.
HOW TO BE A SUPPORTIVE WIFE MANUAL
HOW TO BE A BETTER WIFE RECIPE
This game only
diminishes the manliness
of the man that you're
so desperately seeking,
and diminishes your
womanhood as well. You
will be single handedly
creating your own demise
by doing this. A woman
wants a
man to be the man. She
wants to be the weaker
vessel. She wants to be
what she was intended by
God to be ... If she's
virtuous. Don't shoot
yourself in the foot by
cooking up this kind of
recipe. A similar antic
which women actually
think is clever and
frequently use to try
and "catch" a man, is to
play hard to get. Again,
if you're a TRUTH
seeker, and you
truly love
someone, wild horses
couldn't keep you away
from them. Don't play
games with love. You
could lose.
NEED A BAND AID?
Let's have a little
refresher, in case you
forgot the message back
in Step 4. Okay, so what
do you do now ifffff ...
Perhaps you've been a
very dominating woman.
Your mate, loves you so
much he would rather
allow your persistence
to wield authority that
God never gave woman,
than to lose you. Well,
your respect for each
other, as I mentioned
earlier, needs fixing
and you
may
need to initiate it.
(Because maybe you had
something to do with
creating the problem?) Your domineering causes
his weakness. It's a
cycle that must be
broken. You must
surrender your
insistence to be the
"almighty woman" before
he will ever even be
interested in being the
man that you really want
and need. Communicate.
Surrender. Apologize.
Repent. Start fresh.
Give the king his crown
back ... Yes, that one
that you snatched off of
his head and put on your
own.
JEALOUS?
For some women, instead
of the
dominant/submissive
problem, jealousy of
their mate's job,
reputation, influence,
power, etc., is the
issue. It's a dog-gone
shame, because if the
spirit of jealousy was
instead a spirit of
understanding, so much
more could be
accomplished for God.
We're all unique. We all
have a calling. God has
a plan for each of us.
But as you know, when
you espouse someone
else, you two become
one, and if you are
truly ONE with your
husband, you both will
compliment each other's
qualities and work
together to serve the
Lord in unity. There's
no time for jealousy ...
God has business for you
to do!
HOW TO BE A SUPPORTIVE WIFE FOR THE FAMILY
HOW TO BE A BETTER WIFE FOR YOUR SOUL
Now, here you are,
halfway through with
this program and there
are probably some things
that have become clear
that you really hadn't
contemplated about
before. I'm sure there
have also been some
things that you have
disagreed with, but
because you love God,
you're trying to work
through them, but even
with all this effort,
all this fuss about
being virtuous, deep
inside you may be
wondering ...
WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
Well, beside looking
into the mirror of your
soul and not feeling
disgusted, let me
mention a few of the
benefits of being
virtuous.
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Earthly
Things |
Eternal
Things |
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the
obvious
respect
of other
virtuous
women
and the
secret
respect
of
worldly
women -
trendsetter
strength
and
honor
(verse
25)
admiration
of your
children
(verse
28)
praise
(verse
30)
peace of
mind
self
respect
purpose
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-
eternal
life
-
invitation
to the
Marriage
Supper
of the
Lamb
-
become
an Angel
-
many
mansions
(John
14:2)
-
no
death,
sorrow,
crying,
pain or
tears
(Revelation
21:4)
-
was
there
something
else you
wanted?
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HOW TO BE A SUPPORTIVE WIFE RESEARCH
HOW TO BE A BETTER WIFE IN FAITH
Sounds like a good deal
to me ... In fact, a
bargain!
A virtuous woman learns
all she can from her
husband, but applies it
to her own ministry
within the home. If it
seems like a tough
challenge ... That's
only because the world
has taught you
otherwise. The
environment outside of
her home is not part of
a virtuous woman's
identity.
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1
Corinthians
14:34-35
Let your
women keep
silence in
the
churches:
for it is
not
permitted
unto them to
speak; but
they are
commanded to
be under
obedience as
also saith
the law. And
if they will
learn any
thing, let
them ask
their
husbands at
home: for it
is a shame
for women to
speak in the
church. |
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1 Timothy
2:11-15
Let the
woman learn
in silence
with all
subjection.
But I suffer
not a woman
to teach,
nor to usurp
authority
over the
man, but to
be in
silence. For
Adam was
first
formed, then
Eve. And
Adam was not
deceived,
but the
woman being
deceived was
in the
transgression.
Notwithstanding
she shall be
saved in
childbearing,
if they
continue in
faith and
charity and
holiness
with
sobriety.
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Philippians
4:11
Not that I
speak in
respect of
want: for I
have
learned, in
whatsoever
state I am,
therewith to
be content. |
HOW TO BE A SUPPORTIVE SUMMARY
HOW TO BE A BETTER WIFE CONCLUSION
Did I make those things
up? No way. They're from
the Bible girls. So if
you're in contention,
who are you really in
contention with?
PROCRASTINATION ... UGH!
A lot of times, we don't
face things head on
because we're afraid of
the TRUTH. A big part of
the reason why women
don't adopt virtue as
their default method of
living is because of
selfish reasons. The
TRUTH is, they like the
lifestyle that they
lead, free of the
responsibility of being
righteous ... Yes, being
virtuous does take a lot
of responsibility. They
also don't want to miss
out on the "fun" that
they've become
accustomed to. My
friend, I tell you this
with all sincerity; what
the world offers may
look exciting, fun,
pleasing, captivating
... But we don't see
what lies behind it's
deceptive promises. The
promises of the world
are temporary. What may
seem fun, exciting, or
feel good for a moment
will all soon turn to
dust, but the soul lives
on forever.
You were led here by the
Holy Spirit because in
one way or another, even
though you may be hiding
the TRUTH from yourself
and procrastinating, He
heard your soul groaning
for change. You may not
want to admit it to
yourself, because it
means you will have to
give up some things,
some actions, some
habits, some mannerisms,
but He heard, and He's
hoping you will lean on
Him for help in this
very fulfilling quest
that you've taken on. I
urge you to press on,
because there are a lot
of great things ahead to
learn about and think
about and the rewards
are ...
ETERNAL!
And as always, reflect
on God's Grace, every
day of your life. Thank
Him and praise Him for
it, because it's the
best thing we could ever
hope for! God is proud
of you!
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STEP #15
Meditate on:
CONTENTMENT
Related
Study:
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Selection:
Don't forget
to write in
your
Personal
Journal!
Go back over
each Step
often to be
sure you
have not
missed
anything.
To
continue our program,
select:
STEP #16
I'll meet you there!
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