THE VIRTUOUS WIFE HOW TO BE A GODLY WIFE
Welcome to our Christianity Oasis Virtuous Woman study program. This is the Virtuous Wife Bible study on how to be a Godly Wife as the Lord requests of you. The absolutely be-YOU-tiful message within the Virtuous Wife path to truth will truly bring the LIGHT of Truth to your Christian walk path and become your candle in the cold and oft times lonely darkness.
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THE VIRTUOUS WOMAN
A RECIPE
STEP #3 |
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Welcome back ...
Today's
Virtuous
Vitamin
is
~TRUST~
dependability |
Proverbs
31 ...
Verse 11
The heart of
her husband
doth safely
trust in her
... |
THE VIRTUOUS WIFE JOURNEY HOW TO BE A GODLY WIFE ADVENTURE
So nice to have you back
again. We have a really
great topic to discuss
within this verse, and
it's one that says a lot
about a woman's virtue
... Trust. It's a good
feeling to be trusted.
To know that others
depend on you and that
you're consistent and
predictable says a lot
about your character. It
also reveals that you're
honest. What does the
world think ... Well,
today's woman would
probably tell you that
being UNpredictable is
much more exciting. An
unpredictable person is
someone who you never
know what to expect
from. Do you know people who are proud to be unpredictable? Does that sound
very dependable? Does
that definition depict a
trustworthy individual?
It's your call.
We all
know
that the eyes of God are
on us at every moment,
even when nobody else is
looking. You may have
heard before that it’s
what you do when no one
else is looking, that
really counts and
identifies who you
are. What would God say
if He was asked if you
could be trusted? We will all get our chance to know just that. If you've never heard of the Great White Throne Judgment, you may want to ponder on Revelation 20:12-13. And while reflecting on what it
will be like when we stand before our maker to make our account of our lives, remember that He wants us to live righteously out of love for Him, not out of fear of Him. And NEVER forget that He forgives
us when we repent sincerely.
HOW TO BE A
TRUSTWORTHY
SOUL
Okay, so one of the
first things that king Lemuel's mother listed
as an endearing asset of
a virtuous woman is that
she's trustworthy. Now,
I know we've only been
through a few steps of
the program, and you've
probably seen me wander
off the beaten path of
our topic several times
by now ... Annnnnd ...
Here I go again!
Well ... I have
questions!
Who was this king Lemuel,
anyway? He wasn't
mentioned anywhere else
in the Bible, and even
if you do a web search,
you won't find many hard
facts about him. How old
was he during his reign?
We know that there was
one king (Joash) that
reigned as young as the
age of seven in
Jerusalem, so who
knows? He certainly
wasn't a king of Israel
or Judah any time before the captivity, or he would be
mentioned in one of the
books of Kings. Where
was he from? Oh, what
difference does it make,
right? Maybe. But what
if we want to know more,
so that we can relate
better to the whole
message that this mother
wanted her son to heed.
Then we'll have to just
dig deeper into the
scripture and see what
we can find out.
Let's see if we can get
a little better
acquainted with Lemuel
and his mom, who lived
in a time that was so
very different than our
world today ... Or was
it?
Perhaps it's safe to
assume that Lemuel was
not married yet, and
that his mom hoped to
favorably influence him
about choosing an
honorable woman.
THE VIRTUOUS WIFE PATH TO PEACE HOW TO BE A GODLY WIFE RECIPE
We all know how
protective mothers can
be, right? Well, it may
have been that king
Lemuel's mother sensed
trouble in Lemuel's
future because of one
reason or another. Why
would I assume that? Let
me point out that in the
beginning verses of this
proverb, one thing that
Lemuel's mom made it a
point to warn her son
about, was drinking, so
could it have been that
she noticed that her
son, the king, was apt
to party a little too
... Enthusiastically?
Proverbs
31:4-7
It is not
for kings, O
Lemuel, it
is not for
kings to
drink wine;
nor for
princes
strong
drink: Lest
they drink,
and forget
the law, and
pervert the
judgment of
any of the
afflicted.
Give strong
drink unto
him that is
ready to
perish, and
wine unto
those that
be of heavy
hearts. Let
him drink,
and forget
his poverty,
and remember
his misery
no more. |
Oh, who knows, it could
have been that Lemuel's
dad drank a bit too much
and she didn't want him
to follow in his dad's
footsteps. Or it could
have been that there
were other kings of
neighboring kingdoms
that hit the sauce to
excess. No matter, I'll
get to the point.
Lemuel's mother spent
four verses advising him
about drinking, and
twenty-three
verses advising him
about the importance of
virtue in a woman.
Now, usually royalty is
passed down from
generation to generation
by bloodline, so do you
suppose that Lemuel's
mother, who we might
assume was herself the
wife of a king (Lemuel's
daddy), thought she'd
better have a little
heart to heart with
little Lem and make sure
he didn't just go out
and choose some tawdry
woman to be sitting next
to him on the throne,
because she knew that
such a disgrace could
destroy the kingdom?
Being the wife of a
king, Lemuel's mother
knew how important it was
for her king to
trust her, and
wanted her precious son
to find a woman who he
could trust
as implicitly as
possible.
What's all this got to
do with you?
If you are a married
woman, you are the queen
of your household and
your husband is the
king (so to speak). You work together
as a team for the good
of all in your family.
You have to trust
one another in order for
the family to work in
harmony and to be
profitable servants
representing Jesus. How
do you know trust is
such a big deal and
important for a virtuous
woman? Just imagine
overhearing your king
talking about you and
saying, I think the
queen of the castle is a
virtuous woman ... I
just don't trust her.
GOD LOVES THE VIRTUOUS WIFE HOW TO BE A GODLY WIFE HERE AND NOW
You see how it doesn't
work?!
They go together. They
belong together.
Virtue, trust ...
Together ... They fit.
It just feels right.
Now, we just took a
little detour off the
beaten path so that you
could reach in and open
your mind to exploring
the different
perspectives an issue
can have. Now I'm going
to use some reverse
psychology here, but I'm
warning you ahead of
time so it's all fair.
Here it comes ... It's
good to give new ideas a
chance, right? The new
ideas that this program
is proposing ... Are old
ideas ... Old fashioned
ideas ... Ancient ideas.
Fun, ain't it?
Just to ease your mind a
bit, who really is this
king Lemuel and his mom?
Nobody really seems to
know for certain but the
name Lemuel means "to
God," which some think
is sort of a nickname of
endearment for Solomon
because the Lord
referred to him as
Jedidiah which means
"beloved of God."
Solomon's testimony of
his experiences with
wine and women in the
book of Ecclesiastes
would warrant this kind
of admonition from his
mother, making it easy
to believe that Lemuel may be Solomon.
We also know that
Solomon was very young
when he became king so
it would be fitting for
Bathsheba, his mother to
instruct him as to how
he will need to act as a
king. One last hint that Lemuel may be Solomon is
that his mother
addresses him as the son
of my vows. The first
son of David and
Bathsheba was a son of
adultery, and because it
was a child of broken
vows, that son had to
die, but after David was
forgiven, the Lord
obviously accepted the
marriage vows and the
child Solomon, so we
must all decide for
ourselves whether
Solomon is poetically
referring to himself as Lemuel, or whether the
identity of Lemuel
belongs to someone else.
Now that we've had a
pretty good exercise in
opening our minds and
hearts to different
possibilities, let's get
back to our study, shall
we?
PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE
Remember that I told you
that this whole virtuous
woman lifestyle isn't
easy? (Or did I say it
was? Oh, that's right,
it has something to do
with our attitude,
right?) No matter ...
You must remember to be
patient with yourself.
When you decided that
you wanted to change
your life and seek the
virtuous life, in
essence, you're going
through a rebirth, a
transformation, and
you're setting a new
example for the women of
this day and age. It
won't happen overnight.
There are probably lots
of beliefs that you have
that are un-virtuous,
yet because they are
what was instilled in
you, probably since you
were a child, and you
never learned any
different, you believe
they are virtuous. It
will take time for you
to realize this, and
begin to expose the
TRUTH to yourself about
the lies that the world
has deceivingly taught
you are wholesome.
THE VIRTUOUS WIFE HOPE HOW TO BE A GODLY WIFE HERE AND HEREAFTER
They say this is
brainwashing ... Yes,
many will say that YOU
are the one being
brainwashed into
believing that virtue is
... Virtuous ... How
absurd!
Why oh why do I keep
repeating myself?
Because repetition is
the key to learning and
remembering things. And
like we learned earlier,
many attempts repeated,
complete any
undertaking.
You will stumble, just
like a toddler learning
to walk, you are
learning how to walk a
new walk,
and your old ways may
keep you tripping over
your own feet, and it
may even feel like
you're crawling again,
but you have to get up
and keep on trying.
Everyone makes mistakes.
Everyone has a bad day.
You are not
a failure if you have
trouble with one thing
or another. Just reach
out your hand, grasp on
to the Holy Spirit and
hold on tighter than you
were before and carry
on, with even more
determination to do
better because you've
learned yet another
lesson that will make it
easier to get through
the next time when a
situation arises where
you have to make a
decision between acting
virtuously ... Or not.
Now ... Back to the
subject of trust.
When
you make a mistake,
admit it to yourself, to
God, and to anyone that
you may have hurt by it.
By revealing your
mistakes, you're
demonstrating that you
can be trusted
because you're not
trying to hide anything.
I want you to think
about something for a
moment. Have you ever
done something
untrustworthy and
repented for it, but
later on, you felt like
the person you offended
might never trust you
again, though you
know in your
heart how sorry you are,
and that you will try
with your whole being to
never do anything like
that again?
Guess what, my friend
... Everybody has felt
that before. Even the
person who you think
won't trust you again
has done something
untrustworthy and has
probably felt that same
"they'll never trust me
again" feeling. Maybe
they're very good at
keeping it a secret, but
again, it's that part of
being human called
Original Sin. There's
only One person who is
totally and
unquestionably
trustworthy and that is
Jesus Christ. Everyone
else just falls into
different degrees of
untrustworthiness, so
don't condemn yourself
to a point of depression
or feel like you can
never gain trust again,
because every
relationship goes
through different stages
of trust, and all we can
do is strive to be the
best we can be. When you
fall, sincerely repent
and get back up on your
feet immediately. Each
time God forgives us for
something, He puts His
trust in us once again.
It's a terrible,
horrible feeling to be
un-trusted. Work hard at
being trustworthy. And
always thank God for His
liberating
Grace.
GOD WANTS YOU TO BE THE VIRTUOUS WIFE HOW TO BE A GODLY WIFE TO YOUR MAN AND TO GOD
One time when I was
wallowing in self pity
because of a bad
decision I had made, a
friend of mine (the one
that was affected by my
poor choice) graciously
explained something very
important to me.
Let's say your child
did a bad thing and you
sent her to her room for
time out. You explained
to her that the only
time she ever gets in
trouble is when she does
something that can hurt
another, or hurt
herself. A little while
later you passed by the
door of the child's room
and heard her banging
her head against the
wall because she felt so
bad for what she had
done. That certainly
wasn't what you wanted
her to do. You simply
wanted her to be sorry
for what she did, learn
her lesson, and then
come out and be her
happy little self again.
My friend, God feels the
same way. He doesn't
want you to punish
yourself or pout and
feel unworthy for any
amount of time. He just
wants you to learn your
lesson, sincerely
repent, and get back to
being His beloved child
again.
I have another story to
tell you. This same true
blue friend of mine,
also explained it this
way (at a different time
when I made yet another
poor choice).
When you do something
that hurts someone,
compare it to slapping
them hard in the face.
But then afterward when
you come back into the
light and see what
you've done wrong ...
You cry because you feel
so bad (for yourself)
that you did something
unrighteous. It's kind
of like slapping
someone, and then
crying, "Ohhh, my
poor hand hurts."
Just wanted to share
those two little tidbits
with you, to put in your
arsenal against the
enemy the next time he
tries to convince you
that "Woe is me" is the
path to grace. It is
not.
TRUST IS A MUST
What is the foundation
of love?
Trust.
Notice that it’s the
first virtue mentioned
in this prophecy. It’s a
main ingredient in the
recipe.
Do you ever ask
yourself: Does my
husband trust me
Completely beyond a
shadow of a doubt?
More importantly: Does
God trust me ...
Completely, and beyond a
shadow of a doubt?
God knows your soul by using your spirit to look within you.
You can’t hide anything
from Him.
Proverbs 20:27 ... The spirit of man is the candle of the Lord, searching all the inward parts of the belly.
He doesn't
need to know your User
ID or your password. He
knows what’s in your
secret files, your
journal entries and
what’s hidden behind the
shoe boxes in your
closet. Much more than
that, He knows what’s in
your most secret of
hiding places ... Your
mind. He doesn't need a
special key, a plastic
card, a secret
combination, your
fingerprints, your DNA or to scan
your retinas to gain
access to everything you
think, say and do.
THE VIRTUOUS WIFE OF GOD HOW TO BE A GODLY WIFE AND BRIDE OF CHRIST
1 Chronicles
28:9
And thou,
Solomon my
son, know
thou the God
of thy
father, and
serve Him
with a
perfect
heart and
with a
willing
mind:
for the LORD
searcheth
all hearts,
and
understandeth
all the
imaginations
of the
thoughts:
if thou seek
Him, He will
be found of
thee; but if
thou forsake
Him, He will
cast thee
off for
ever. |
Romans 8:27
And
He that
searcheth
the hearts
knoweth what
is the mind
of the
Spirit,
because He
maketh
intercession
for the
saints
according to
the will of
God. |
Proverbs
20:27
The spirit
of man is
the candle
of the LORD,
searching
all the
inward parts
of the belly. |
Proverbs
16:2
All the ways
of a man are
clean in his
own eyes;
but
the LORD
weigheth the
spirits. |
Hebrews 4:12
For the Word
of God is
quick, and
powerful,
and
sharper than
any two
edged sword,
piercing
even to the
dividing
asunder of
soul and
spirit, and
of the
joints and
marrow, and
is
a discerner
of the
thoughts and
intents of
the heart. |
BECOME THE VIRTUOUS WIFE HOW TO BE A GODLY WIFE INSTRUCTIONS
Trust is a whole bunch
different with God than
it is with anyone else
because of the fact that
He knows everything
already. But what about
your earthly husband? Is
God looking at your
relationship with Him as
an example of what kind
of bride you’ll be in
Heaven?
Again, I stress to you
that our all merciful
Father knows all our
weaknesses, but we
shouldn't use weakness
as an excuse for doing
things that are not
virtuous. The Lord also
knows our determination,
and our sincerity, and
our repentance, and
that's how we gain His
Grace and His trust
again when we do
something we wish we
hadn't. We're made in
His image, and if you
turn the tables and look
at it from an objective
point of view, we all
want to trust those who
are near to us, so use
the Golden Rule and your
loved ones will safely
trust in you.
Now, the complete verse:
Proverbs 31
... Verse 11
The
heart of her
husband doth
safely trust
in her, so
that he
shall have
no need of
spoil. |
What does this mean ...
Spoil? To spoil means to
rob. This could mean that the
husband of a virtuous
woman has no need to
worry that the
faithfulness of his
betrothed will be taken away
by anything or anyone, and that she will never cause him damage or shame. And what assures him
of that?
TRUST!
How To Be Trustworthy
... Is the question.
WHAT CAN SPOIL A
MARRIAGE?
People today believe in
their heart that
untrustworthy behavior
is innocent and
harmless. Flirting is
regarded with
admiration, and so very
sadly, oft times a
person’s own spouse
thinks of this as a
redeeming quality in
their wife or husband,
instead of the
destructive tool of
indecency that it really
is. It is the "gateway
drug" to infidelity.
You might think I'm being a
little extreme, but
think about it, it's
almost like sport. Start
observing people and
take note of how much
"charming" there is
going on around you. It
is commonly viewed as
just being
friendly, or cute, but
how does most infidelity
start? By an innocent
???????
little smile? People
today are exceedingly
too personal with people
they aren’t married to.
Whether it be an
inappropriate look, word
or gesture, it's easy to
see that this is not the
manner of a virtuous
woman.
YOU CAN BECOME THE VIRTUOUS WIFE HOW TO BE A GODLY WIFE SECRETS
Have a little heart to
heart with God and ask
Him what's appropriate
and what isn't when
communicating with
someone you're not
married to. Always pray
that the Holy Spirit be
with you and between you
and another person who
you're not espoused to,
so that impropriety
never occurs.
Since we're being honest
with ourselves, let me
ask you a question.
You've seen the enemy
teach this on television
millions of times, but
how many times while
greeting someone with a
handshake, have you seen
someone smile at the
person flirtatiously
instead of a smile of
fellowship?
Incidentally, did you
know that in the Bible,
a handshake was to
confirm agreement about
something, and in the
old west, it was to show
that you weren't holding
a gun, but today ... Oh
my.
If you were betrothed to
the Lord (which you are,
if Heaven is your
desired destination),
does it all seem so
innocent and harmless
anymore? Will He be
looking for someone else
who His heart can safely
trust in more? I ask
again, Is your devotion
to your husband a test
of what kind of angel
and bride you would be
to the Lord? It’s
something worth
considering very
carefully.
James 1:12
Blessed is
the man that
endureth
temptation:
for when he
is tried, he
shall
receive the
crown of
life, which
the Lord
hath
promised to
them that
love Him. |
THE VIRTUOUS WIFE CONCLUSION HOW TO BE A GODLY WIFE SUMMARY
You can change your life
so that you are worthy
of His trust; and if you
know the Lord trusts
you, you can be sure
your soul-mate here on
earth, too,
will have no worries
about your
trustworthiness. Pray
about how to be
trustworthy. The power
of prayer is something
every virtuous woman
needs in her life.
And as always, reflect
on God's grace, and
thank Him, each and
every day.
STEP #3
Meditate on:
TRUST
Related
Study:
Music
Selection:
Don't forget
to write in
your
Personal
Journal!
Go back over
each step
often to be
sure you
have not
missed
anything.To
continue our program,
select:
STEP #4
I’ll meet you there!
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