Before we get started, I encourage you to ask the Holy Spirit to open your mind and heart to the TRUTH each time you begin a new Step of this program. That's very important as there are a lot of controversial topics in our study, but if you're led by the Holy Spirit, which is the Spirit of TRUTH, you'll be able to discern things much easier.

To start off, I'd like to ask you to do me a favor.

I'd like for you to go through all 28 Steps before you make any final judgments about the program. There may be things you'll discover toward the very end that will change your mind about something that you may have had a difficult time accepting or agreeing with in the early Steps of the program. Change is a progression, and you owe it to yourself to read the WHOLE thing, or you may be cheating yourself.

Does being virtuous, as the Bible teaches, seem like just too much to ask in today's world? As your sibling in Christ and your friend, I tell you with all honesty, I understand what you're feeling, and I myself put virtue on hold for many years because I thought I'd be missing something exciting if I was a Little Miss Goody Two Shoes.

I have to confess that I purposely avoided seeking and learning what the Bible teaches about being virtuous, because I knew I'd feel guilty for not wanting to actually live it. I knew I'd feel like more of a sinner if I actually saw the words with my own eyes and chose not to adhere to them.

I felt like I was protecting myself, because I could plead ignorance! Very clever how the enemy of my soul CON-vinced me of that. Bottom line ... I felt like I just wasn't ready to be virtuous yet. I didn't want to be, I didn't care, in fact, I was so lost that I believed it was cool to be naughty.

I wish now that I had made different choices. I wish I had been smart enough to realize what a dangerous place my soul had been in, and how easily I may have been persuaded to do even more extreme things that would have landed my soul in hell if I hadn't been rescued in time.

I was very close to the edge of a cliff, so to speak.

But enough about me, I'd like to talk about you for a while.

I have a question to ask you. If you could be a little girl again, would you do it? Now, A lot of people might say, "Only if I knew what I know now." And in some respects, that's a very clever answer, but believe me, the last thing the lil girl within needs is to know what mature women of today know.

I have to ask you another question ... Aren't the things that the world taught you when you became "a woman" the exact things that have stolen your virtue? If you were a little girl and you knew what you know now, you'd probably be a very unhappy little soul, because the happiness of youth is the purity in it.

 I'd like to help you find purity and happiness in your life today, and take you on a trip back to being a little girl again. How do you get back to that age of innocence? Well, you have to take the same path that led you to this point in your life, and travel in the opposite direction. You have to replace the untruths that you learned on your way with TRUTH.

Each time you learn the TRUTH about something, you're one step closer to being the little girl you used to be, because you will begin to make different choices in your life ...

Righteous choices ...

The kind of choices you made as a little girl, who never had to think twice about right and wrong, but just naturally chose the right things out of innocence and a humble heart. You'll see that the child of God within you isn't really hard to find at all ...

All you have to do is search for her.

Together, we'll overcome the obstacles that inevitably present themselves in today's world and steal away virtue from women, oft times without their even knowing it.

How again?

By revealing the TRUTH.

We're going on a treasure hunt ... And the treasure is TRUTH.

Before we begin this adventure, I want you to know that I'm your friend, I'm on your side and I'm not here to deprive you of enjoying life or having fun, I'm not here to condemn or judge, but to help you to understand how much more fulfilling your life can be, if you will open your heart to the TRUTH.

Just how difficult is it to be a virtuous woman?

Well, you can make it difficult, by believing that it is, or you can make it easy, by believing it is.

Your attitude directly effects how easy or hard anything in life is.

All you have to do, is open your mind and heart, take my hand, and we'll take a look at the world from a different perspective that most women just cannot see ...

A person's point of view is a powerful thing. A belief in something can and will make things come true for a person, if you believe with your whole heart.

Martha always made roast on special occasions for her family. It was a special "family recipe" handed down from generation to generation. Everyone loved it. Martha, like her mother and her grandmother and her great grandmother before her had done, cut off one end of the roast, put it in a separate pan, seasoned it with your usual herbs and spices and cooked it very slowly. It came out perfect every time. She believed it would.

One day at a family reunion, Martha was talking to her great grandmother, and she asked her, why did they cut off one end of the roast. To Martha's surprise, her great grandmother told her that in the old days, they didn't have a pan big enough to fit the entire roast in, so they cut one end off and used two pans. 

Are there things that you do in your life that are similar to this? What I mean is, are there things that you do ... Things that are traditions of the world, and you really don't understand why you do them, except that ... You believe you should because everyone else does it? What if those things are really just making it more difficult to accomplish what Jesus wants you to do as a Christian woman?

Do you think after that family reunion, Martha ever cut off the end of the roast again?

I'd like to invite you to have sort of a "reunion" of your own ... A reunion with your femininity. Remember back to when you were a little girl. Boys had cooties. Dressing up fancy was gross. All you really wanted to do was to go and play or color. And anything that you thought was unrighteous ... You announced loudly and proudly by saying ...

Why don't we follow those kind of traditions in our lives today? 

The TRUTH is, that little girl inside of you, the one that you locked away so many years ago as to pursue the world and it's seemingly desirable offerings ... The one you left behind to chase boys, wear alluring clothes, wear make up and perfume, watch soap operas and keep dirty little secrets ...

Remember, He said, that you must be as a child ...

The innocence, the wholesomeness, the decency, the zeal, the determination, the purity ... All of it.
 

Let's talk about another recipe ...
Let's talk about the recipe for the perfect ... BRIDE!

Now that's a recipe that should be passed down from generation to generation.
 
This recipe isn't just for an appetizer or an entree or a dessert, it's much more than that.
 
Actually it's not only a recipe for preparing the perfect bride ...
 
But for preparing to be the bride of Christ.  

 That’s the confection that we all should be striving to perfect.

What are we waiting for?

A bigger pan?

No, the thing that we lack is FAITH.

Way down deep in our hearts, many of us think that we're not worthy enough to earn the wedding cake that our Lord so truly wants us to share with Him. In our eyes, the recipe is too difficult and we don’t believe that we have the ingredients necessary to prepare it ...

But if you add a little FAITH to the recipe what could happen then? That's the only ingredient you need to get started.
Have FAITH in your FAITH!

Did ya get that? Not only can you move mountains with Faith, but you can even pick those rascals up and throw them into the sea!
 

Within Proverbs, Chapter 31 is the recipe for being a virtuous woman.

I'd like for you to read it in just a moment, because it's exactly what we'll be talking about throughout this program.

In Verse 4 through 9, we learn more about the wise choices a king should make, but then, starting at Verse 10 through the end of the chapter are the qualities that Lemuel's mother told him befit a virtuous woman.

It's such a slow poisoning that most women don't know the danger their souls are in, and would even argue tooth and nail that the methods and beliefs of the world are just as they should be. After all, we're living in the 21st century!

All I can say is, sister, those who don't give virtue a chance are in ...

As Pocahontas would say ... Heap big trouble.

Since the Bible was written so long ago, many find it easy to disregard some things in scripture, with the conclusion that these teachings have gone out of style since they are no longer the "way" of the world.

I've even been told,

"I believe in the Bible, but you're not supposed to actually live by it."
 
My question is, "And when exactly did the Lord say that?" As you venture deeper into this program and become more acquainted with what the Bible deems as virtuous, ask yourself from time to time if the Lord has changed His standards ... Or is it the world that has changed?

How does one apply this to their life today? And what if you haven't much to sell to begin with?

Dig deeper into this scripture with me. Could Jesus have meant to give up the ways of the world? Sell out for Jesus?

Could He have meant, Let nothing come between you and following me?

It's not an easy task ... Being virtuous.

Hey! Wait a minute, you may be saying, didn't you just say a few paragraphs back that it is easy?

Allow me to me elaborate:

Boiling water is easy ...

In your kitchen ...

 That is, IF the world is your master.

I challenge you to ask yourself ... Can you imagine standing before Jesus, hoping to be His bride and being refused because you were TOO virtuous?

No. No way. Personally, I WANT to be overqualified for that job.

I urge you to resist the temptation to reject the ideas that you will be encountering here because they don't fit the image of "today's woman" or that lifestyle.

That's the whole point!

Were you made in the image of "today's woman" or in the image of God?

Beware of those who promote being a "today's woman."

They may even claim that they have Christian motives ...

Then why aren't they bragging about being a virtuous woman instead of a "today's woman?"

What's the difference between the two anyway?

Virtue isn't a value of today.

But that's just me ... When you have a moment to yourself, ask yourself honestly, What does it mean (to you) to be a woman today?

There's a battle going on for your soul between the devil and God, and that's why we call the devil the enemy of your soul. The battle is known as Spiritual Warfare. If you choose the ways of the world, the devil will win your soul, but if you choose THE WAY, THE TRUTH, and THE LIFE of the Lord ... God wins, and YOU WIN eternal life!

Did you know that the devil is the prince of this world? So when you choose the ways of the world, whose ways are you choosing?

These are the Words of Jesus:

But it's true, the devil (who disregards Jesus as He says in the underlined portion of the top scripture above), will use every way he can to charm and influence every soul he possibly can to choose his ways, because so deep is his jealousy for God. 

I want to gently warn you (and I will, many times) that everyone you know may think you're a freak because of the choices you make when you choose to follow Jesus' plan for how a woman should be, but remember that Jesus did tell us to rejoice when people disapprove of us in His name.

Another thing to remember is that nobody is perfect except Jesus, though we strive to be the best we can be.

As I said, you may find some concepts suggested here very hard to accept or agree with at first, because of what you've been taught by the world. You may get stuck in the middle, you may have a bad day or two, you may be challenged by outside influences, or you may get close to the end and the enemy will turn up the heat on you and put doubt in your mind or some other kind of temptation to thwart your progress because he knows he's losing the battle, but don't forget, this is YOUR personal program, and YOUR determination will determine the outcome.

You will only get out of it, what you put into it. If you are having trouble with a certain aspect of the program, I encourage you to seek more TRUTH concerning whatever you have questions about by either prayer, communing with one of the female Christian team leaders or by writing an e-mail to VirtuousWoman@ChristianityOasis.com with your particular question or problem, but I urge you with all my heart, not to give up.

Throughout this program, there are scripture passages to support the different viewpoints that we’ll be looking at. I urge you to reflect on them, read them slowly and carefully and enjoy the beauty in the Word of God. Pray that the Holy Spirit reveals the message of each scripture to you, and that you understand how it relates to the topic we're discussing at the time.

Another thing to keep in mind is that the Bible oft times refers to “man” in scripture.

God’s Word is intended for all of us ... Men and women alike. So it makes sense that women are not exempt from obeying God’s Word, and where “man” is referred to, remember that “mankind” is a good way to look at it.

You may also find yourself thinking that these passages are being taken out of context, so if that crosses your mind, I encourage you to investigate it. Look up the scripture (each of them is linked to the King James Bible online for your convenience), research what the scripture says in its entirety, and then decide for yourself if it is relevant to our discussion.

 But a word to those who will only consider things in context, Jesus spoke in parables, with hopes that people would apply them to their own lives in any situation necessary. His analogies have rang true in billions of different circumstances through many generations and still do today. Do you think that He would object to the Word being taken out of context and used as often as possible, as long as it was for a righteous purpose? 

And when these scriptures were quoted, each time were they speaking in context about how difficult it will be for the rich to enter the Kingdom of Heaven, as was the case in the scripture from Matthew? Or were they referring to how Mary could have possibly conceived Jesus by the Holy Ghost, as was the case in the scripture from Luke? Or were they speaking of Sarah having a child when she was past the age of childbearing, as was the case in the scripture from Genesis? Of course not. But the promise of these scriptures is TRUTH and CAN be applied to countless different things "out of context."

Whether you’re single or married, young or old, widowed, divorced, rich, poor, healthy, ill, or otherwise ... While reflecting on these scripture passages, remember that it is the Lamb of God to whom you are truly betrothed.

I'd just like to stress that point once again. No matter what your personal "status" is ... If you are a Christian, your goal is to be the bride of Christ, and your deeds should reflect such. If you are married to an earthly husband, and you're not being a virtuous wife, how do you think the Lord feels about the kind of Bride you will be to Him?

I'm going to help you get ready. 

How does one prepare for the marriage of the Lamb?

It’s a lifestyle. The "recipe" is a lifestyle.

So, what are the ingredients?

The ingredients are fruits, but they’re not just any old fruits, they’re fruits of the Spirit. And, what are fruits of the Spirit?

Fruits of the Spirit are virtues. And what is a virtue?

Webster describes a virtue as: A particular moral excellence.

The Apostle Paul describes it this way:

In short, your virtues ... Or fruits ... Make up your character. Prudence, honesty, reverence, generosity, benevolence, humility, compassion ... These are all ingredients that are found in the recipe.
 
They are the parts of you that inwardly and outwardly give glory to God.
 
The ingredients cost no money. They cannot be bought at the mall, at the market or even at your Christian store for that matter. In fact, they're already in your cabinet (inside of you). You just have to dig deep to attain them. God put them inside you when He created you in His image. When you were a little girl, you practiced all of these things, but somewhere along the way, they were replaced with other ingredients. Not done away with, they're still there, they just got pushed to the back of the cabinet. Bring them back out! All you have to do is reach in and dust them off. The reward is watching the Lord work in your life to prepare you for everlasting life as His bride.

Focus on good in your life. Think good thoughts. Associate with good people. Do good deeds. Radiate goodness. By doing so, you are glorifying God, because God is good!

ANOTHER QUALITIES OF A VIRTUOUS WOMAN IS PERSISTENCE

I urge you, no matter how much it seems to 'cramp your style,' persist at your new goal. You'll find that your 'style' was really created by a wicked designer, keeping you from reaching within yourself and finding your true femininity. Seek the woman that God created you to be, not the woman the world expects you to be. 

I'd like to give you some more food for thought about your femininity. I'd like for you to develop a new attitude about being a woman. I'd like you to appreciate the wonder that God created you to be.

We'll walk through this wonderful transformation Step by Step, and we'll laugh together and cry together, and we'll have some very serious moments, and there will be times when you'll want to just turn my nose in a knot! But I assure you, I am looking out for your best interests in all I say, and my only purpose is to help you draw closer to God.

Not only did our Father create us to glorify Him, but ever since the very first man and woman, we women are the vessels by which His creation is made manifest. We are made to be fruitful. But bearing children is not something to be thought of as superior to man, taken advantage of, or taken for granted, it's a privilege and an honor. A barren woman also has a duty and obligation to glorify God. If you're unable to have children, without a doubt, you have a different calling and God has other blessings for you in His plan, if you'll seek them. We'll be discussing that later in the program too. Before we were born, the Lord planned these things. 

If there are any obstacles in your life right now that you believe would impede your success in giving your all to this program, it would be in your best interest to resolve them first. Before you put good in, you should take bad out. Below is a list of studies that may help you. If any of these topics apply to you, or you're interested in learning more to help a person you know who is challenged by any of these things, please do so. In your spare time, choose to read some of these studies as to enhance your Virtuous Woman walk.

The Virtuous Woman program is divided into 28 Steps. This first Step is quite lengthy, but most of the others are only about half as long. Whether you wish to study one Step each day, or several Steps at a time is up to you. My suggestion would be to follow the program one Step each day, then after reading the program the first time, read one Step a day, each month, until it becomes second nature to you. For many years now, the world has daily influenced you that you should follow it's ways. In the same way, you must daily reinforce that THE WAY of Jesus is the only TRUTH.

At the beginning of each Step, we'll start with the "Virtuous Vitamin" which is a separate virtue and it's definition for you to add to your recipe for success as a virtuous woman. Just as you need essential vitamins and minerals in your physical diet to insure good physical health, you also need to fortify your spirit with virtue to maintain strong faith and character to bear the name of Jesus Christ, your betrothed. Each day, focus on making that particular virtue a part of your permanent character. At the bottom of each Step, I'll remind you to meditate (think and rethink) about this specific virtue. Ponder on how you can increase it in your life. Ask yourself how Jesus may have demonstrated that virtue in His life for us to follow. 

As part of this program, I'd also like for you to start a Personal Journal. Just jot down your thoughts, your trials and tribulations, your questions, maybe write a psalm, or your goals, once a day. Keep it private ... Just between you and God. When you find answers to your questions, write them down too. That is very important. It's a great way to look back and see your progress and it also shows the Lord your determination to be a virtuous bride for Him. If you can't think of anything to write, you can write about the virtue that you are to meditate on for that Step, perhaps how you can increase it in your lifestyle.

In the box at the bottom of each Step, there may be a link to a related study to enhance your program. You may have already read some of these studies if you have participated in any of the other programs that Christianity Oasis offers, or you may have discovered them through the Christian Walk Studies page, but all of our studies are Bible based and the Word was intended for us to partake of often, not only once. We do frequently add information to our studies, (even this one!) and you always comprehend something better each successive time that you study it, so I encourage you to go on ahead and enjoy them again!

In this same box at the bottom of each Step, there also may be a link to a Music Selection for you to enjoy. If you cannot get the music because of your Internet Service Provider or any other reason, it will not affect your program, it is simply an optional enhancer.

LET US CONTINUE THIS QUALITIES OF A VIRTUOUS WOMAN PATH FOR MORE QUALITIES OF A VIRTUOUS WOMAN